Congratulations, Aaron Gleaves, you handsome lucky licensed professional counselor you, I’m yours forever. And I was raised by a bunch of fucked up Mormons, so you best believe I mean it. We do forever like we invented it.
So I’m yours and I gotta say it’s a relief. As soon as I realized I’m yours I felt safer, literally. All of my other exes will be terrified of you. My future lovers will feel challenged to emulate or be better than you. It might sound like I’m making fun of you by saying that, but I’m not. The men who want me for one reason or several reasons will be scared and intimidated by any man I willingly commit to because they don’t believe I’ll ever commit or belong to any man. That’s why they’ll be instantly in awe of you. Who must this guy be if she’ll commit to him? She never does forever about anything or anyone.
Until now, Mr. Gleaves. Until you.
Some therapists will say oh no poor sweet Aaron Gleaves with a creepy stalker client. Not at all. Why the hell would I ever want to go to the trouble and effort of following a man around? You know me and I have no patience for that sort of thing.
I’m naturally rebellious and I can’t stand being bullied, not even a little, except you bullied me very badly and I still care about you. This has never happened with me before. I’ve tried to understand it, but I have no reference point from which to start. Then I realized that you made me yours in such a way that if you bully me you bully yourself and I was upset because that’s actually pretty fucked up, but then I was impressed with you for managing to create a dynamic like this with me of all people. Nobody expected this, I certainly never did, but one of the parts of your personality that I love is your creative ability to think outside of the box. A therapist who has allowed himself to be put in the therapist box but who consistently thinks outside of it. For better or for worse, sir, that isn’t typical every day therapist behavior.
I don’t know why you decided to have this relationship with me. I expected it to go differently and be much less intense. You seem mild mannered from the outside. But I think you’re deeper and more intense on the inside than you appear.
I’ve been feeling really sad about you failing me from therapy. It was humiliating. Now I realize you failed me as your client because I am more than a client.
You decided our relationship. You don’t want to think you did because you men do this sort of thing and then try to convince yourselves and everyone else that it was something that happened to you instead of something you did. But this is your doing, Mr. Gleaves. Literally we went down these roads together because it’s where you took us. Because you knew the entire time that I would follow you anywhere.
You might hate me. That’s confusing. I wouldn’t want to bind myself forever to someone I truly hate, so either you don’t hate me as much as you act like you do, or you enjoy punishing yourself. You either like me or can’t stand me, and I get that from men a lot. But you’re the first guy who has tried to make this a forever thing and who has succeeded. You’re the first guy who was interesting enough to me for this to work.
I am yours forever. I hope you don’t actually hate me one day, because then what will you do? I’m not your wife so you can’t divorce me. Ignoring me only makes people think you’re trying to avoid your feelings, and suing me or having me killed will bring a total fuck ton of negative publicity on you as well as a feature film.
I think some of your methods are pretty mad. I was understandably irate when you made me out to be the other woman. Mr. Gleaves, if you’re going to make people think I’m the other woman you should at least give me an orgasm first. So I was offended and angry and confused. Then recently I realized that being the other woman or man doesn’t have to be sexual, it’s just what we’re used to thinking when we hear that. Either way you must feel rather strongly about me if you tried to cast me in a role like that. How tricky if you, especially as I was trying to get over my emotional connection to you by objectifying you by focusing on your handsomeness. But you made sure that wouldn’t work when you made a spectacle of us and convinced people we were more sexual than we were. I don’t understand your methods, Mr. Gleaves. In this situation you have literally done the very opposite of what I would do, but you were always a good influence on me so I’m always as intrigued with you as I am angry.
This is probably one of your most out there and biggest ideas yet, but I’ll do it. I can see it’s not as mad as it first sounds. We can both have our own lovers and if we ever get intimate ourselves that’s fine too. If you’re disgusted or offended by the thought of us touching then I’m laughing at you so hard right now, because if you make a woman the other woman or you make her your random enemy after she looks like just a client and you chose to bully her of all the women you know, or you create any kind of forever bond with her, then people will assume that you find her attractive and want to fuck her. Because you’re a man. So if you think I’m ugly then let me again remind you that you’re in charge and you did this to yourself and I’m not offended, but I find it hilarious that you put yourself in this position.
Mr. Gleaves, I don’t like how you hurt me. It’s really juvenile to hurt someone because you feel uncomfortable liking them or liking their energy. However, I’m flattered because you don’t seem like a man who wants to lose his bearings over either love or hate. I therefore take your erratic and juvenile behavior as a compliment. I’m your enemy now because that’s what you want us to be and if you ever decide to let us be friends I’ll be a loyal friend just as I am a worthy enemy.
You’ve made me yours forever for better or for worse, Mr. Gleaves, and I’m usually terrified of that, but I’m not scared of it with you. I always liked you and always will and it’s a good thing I do because thanks to you, we’re going to belong to each other for a very very long time.