Not just because he would never consider it with me. Obviously, but come on, there’s no need to be insulting. I embrace my Clare Danes kind of beauty because it’s more of an overall kind of beauty that you can’t quite put your finger on. Not that I’m as pretty as she is, just saying.
The Therapist’s reasons that he won’t have sex with me are his and probably numerous, but I actually happen have to very solid and real reasons myself why having sex with The Therapist is something that would be on my will definitely not do list, if I bothered to make a list.
My first reason is because we’d have a great time, but I could picture The Therapist telling people we didn’t, or telling people I was a bad lover or something. Even my dumb exes don’t say that about me, but The Therapist seems to want to outdo all of the other men in my life, so he’d probably say it was bad sex, which it would never be. Then I’d have to start a blog about how good our sex was and give you the specific details of why it was good. You don’t want to read that and I’m not good at writing erotica because erotica makes me laugh, so this is my first reason.
My second reason has to do with how people jump to partially wrong assumptions when I write about how attractive The Therapist is.
I do think he’s very beautiful, but there’s an accompanying assumption that I want to have sex with him. I laugh about it, but it is a bit annoying, because having sex with The Therapist would be a major downgrade from what we had at the height of our pretend relationship.
Sex is one of the least personal and most mechanical things in the world, while therapy is one of the most personal things. To be any good at therapy at all requires actual skills like good active listening. Good therapy is way better than good sex. As a big fan of sex, which I won’t ever deny, I just said what I said.
The Therapist is very sexually attractive. Being physical with him would be a mind-blowing level of wonderful. I know it would. I can picture him and how he would feel. Basic positions would feel better than basic with him. Yes, he is gorgeous and well built.
But if people want to be upset with me, please be accurate with what you’re upset about.
I like The Therapist better than sex and better than chocolate.
Now you can be upset.